Today, I experience a few "insights." In talking about my future, I realized that I really don't have it all together as much as I thought. I really don't know exactly what I want. That's frustrating for a person who thrives on "having it together." I had a helpful discussion that lead me to believe that I don't necessarily need to come up with the solution on my own. I hope by this time next week I'll have a better idea. I just want to be successful, challenged.
The other insight was around my finances. I had the realization today that in the midst of all the drama that had occurred in my life late last year, I started spending out of control. Like what? God I don't even know, cause I was doing it without a lot of care. I brought clothes (which I love to do), lots and lots of shoes, ate out a lot I guess and bought a vacation with no planning to Australia and New Zealand. I knew I was spending poorly but what I didn't figure out until today was I was using shopping as a stress relief or plainly forget about the drama. That is some scary shit! What the hell am I doing? Not okay. I mean I had fun but I'll be 30 this year so it's time to get myself in order. I mean have fun on a budget and maybe plan a little more accordingly for my large international vacations.
I'm now a little hyper sensitive... like where am I going and if I don't know, at least save some money and prepare to not work forever.
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